A GUIDE FOR GUIDES
Leading Others on the Follow The Way Discipleship Journey
ARE YOU READY?!
Thank you for becoming a guide or considering being a guide for a Follow the Way Discovery Discipleship Group. You’re in for the journey of your life!
Are you ready to grow? As you disciple others, you’ll be challenged to think through your faith, share your faith and live out your faith. Your faith might just grow more than those you are discipling.
Are you ready to see God move? By discipling others, you’ll have a front-row seat on God’s life-changing power. You’ll often be cheering God on as you see people’s lives change right before your very eyes.
Are you ready to be used? When you’re up close and personal with people who are exploring the Christian faith and what it means to follow Jesus, God will use you powerfully. You’ll walk away saying, “I can’t believe I get to do this. I can’t believe God could use me like that. What a privilege and what a blast!”
Are you ready to go? Here are nine stepping stones on the path to becoming an effective discipleship guide.
PREPARE
The ideal is for you to have worked through Follow The Way with a guide and some fellow travelers.
Now that you are leading others through it, read through the material again before meeting together. You’ll be amazed at how much more you’ll get out the sessions as you work through them again with others.
PRAY
Pray for God’s help.
Pray for the members of your discipleship group.
Pray for open hearts and minds to hear from the Lord.
Pray for protection from spiritual interference.
Pray that the strongholds of lies will be replaced by the power and freedom of God’s truth.
Pray for spiritual discernment as you minister individually to each person in your group.
Pray for the matters raised and the prayer requests shared at the weekly meetings.
DISCIPLE
The aim of Follow The Way is to help others personally meet Jesus through the Bible and commit to living a life of following Him.
In the Bible, a follower of Jesus is also called a disciple of Jesus. A disciple is a student or you can think of them as an apprentice (or intern, trainee, mentee, medical resident). Discipleship isn’t just about believing in Jesus. It’s also about developing a relationship with Jesus so that you become like Jesus in everything you think, say and do. It’s about being with Jesus so that you learn to live your life as if Jesus were in your shoes.
Discipleship is the relational, biblical and intentional process of helping someone both become a follower of Jesus Christ and mature as a follower of Jesus Christ. Specifically, it’s about growing in WORSHIP of Jesus, DISCOVERY of His Word, COMMUNITY with other believers and MISSION to those around them (See Luke 5:1-11).
To disciple others you need to first be a disciple yourself. So keep growing and maturing in your own walk with the Lord. Commit to being a lifelong learner and imitator of Jesus and His way of life.
Be transparent about your own growth as a disciple of Jesus and where your growth challenges exist.
As you grow and as others see you grow, you’ll be able to say with the Apostle Paul, Follow me as I follow Christ (1 Corinthians 11:1).
In order to help others practically follow Jesus, use what is called the 3/3s Format (Connect-Discover-Live).
DISCOVERY DISCIPLESHIP GROUP
3/3s Format
CONNECT
What are you thankful for?
What challenge are you facing?
Have there been any answers to prayer?
Pray for each other.
How did your “I will …” statement from last week go?
How did your sharing goal from last week go?
DISCOVER
Ask God to speak to you as you read His Word.
Read a Bible passage.
Have someone retell the passage in their own words.
What stands out to you in this passage?
What does this passage say about God (The Father, His Son Jesus Christ, the Holy Spirit)?
What does this passage say about people, including ourselves?
What does this passage say about the life God invites us to live?
LIVE
What truth have you discovered from today’s Bible passage(s) and conversation?
What would stop you from believing and obeying this truth?
How will you live out this truth this coming week? Finish this statement: “I will ….”
Who else needs to hear this truth? How could you share it with them?
When will we meet again?
Who will facilitate that meeting?
Pray for God’s help as you seek to follow Jesus this coming week.
BUDDY SYSTEM
It’s recommended that you set up a buddy system for ongoing encouragement and accountability. Buddy people up and have them contact each other for a midweek check-in. Think of this as a five-minute phone call, rather than an in-person sit-down meeting. Touch base and ask these questions of each other:
How are your readings going?
How’s your “I will …” statement coming along?
How’s your sharing goal coming along?
How can I pray for you?
This 3/3s Format is designed to promote a balance of knowledge, obedience and sharing (KOS).
Knowledge leads the way, but obedience and sharing need to follow in step.
That’s why these 4 questions are so important to emphasize …
What truth have you discovered from today’s Bible passage(s) and conversation?
What have they heard from Jesus?
What would stop you from believing and obeying this truth?
What blockages (questions, objections, fears, etc.) to believing and obeying do you need to help them overcome?
How will you live out this truth this coming week? Finish this statement: “I will ….”
How will they now obey Jesus?
Whom do you know that needs to hear this truth? How could you share it?
How will they share Jesus?
Good things happen when you ask good questions.
And it’s important that at the following meeting everyone reports on how their obedience and sharing are going.
Once again, this 3/3s Format is designed to promote a balance of knowledge, obedience and sharing.
Record or have someone else record each person’s weekly “I will …” statement, sharing goal and prayer requests. It may be good to text or email these to the group a day or two after you meet to remind people of their commitments and the prayer requests.
Ensure the buddy system is working effectively. This will build community and encourage accountability. This also engages all the participants in discipling each other and trains them to disciple others.
Notice that part of the 3/3s Format is the question: Who will facilitate our next meeting? An important part of leading the group is helping us facilitate the group. That way they can lead a group on their own once they’re done with you.
In addition, to the Discover questions from above, most sessions of Follow The Way have Digging Deeper questions. Usually, you would start with the Discover questions and then work through the Digging Deeper question. But there may be occasions, due to time or focus, that you would skip the Discover questions and go right from the Bible readings to the Digging Deeper questions. You may need to experiment with this.
When your group has worked through one part direct then to the next part until you have finished all 6 (FOLLOW-FAITH-FRUIT-FILLING-FOUNDATIONS-FREEDOM).
You may need to meet one-on-one with someone from your group to answer a question or explore an issue. Be available to your group, but also maintain healthy boundaries.
DO LIFE TOGETHER! Think about how Jesus discipled His disciples. They would walk to places together, eat meals together, do ministry together—just hang out TOGETHER. So in addition to working through the Follow The Way material, spend time eating and playing and serving and doing life together. In this way, your disciples will see how your walk with Jesus looks in real life.
DIRECT
Don’t be afraid to lead your group at the weekly meetings.
Direct, but don’t dominate. Don’t monopolize the conversation.
Your role isn’t to teach, but to ask good questions, to direct your group to God’s Word and to actively listen to their responses and the Spirit’s leading.
Good things happen when you ask good questions.
Note rabbit holes and pull your group back to the main path.
You may need to slow down the pace of one session per week. There may be some sessions that you need to go deeper with the following week. Some sessions may call for a response like going out a prayer outreach. You may need an extra week for that. Take your time. The goal isn’t to get through the material as fast as possible, but to raise up fully devoted followers of Jesus Christ. There’s no way to rush that.
CELEBRATE
Celebrate insights, growth and community.
Say, “Great point! I’ve never seen it that way.” “That was a big ‘I will …’ statement. Way to follow through and make it happen!” “I love how we’re starting to really minister to each other."
En-courage your group through celebration.
CORRECT
What do you do when someone answers a question in a way that is clearly wrong or headed in the wrong direction?
For example, someone may say, “God the Father had sex with Mary and that’s how Jesus was conceived.” Okay, that may be a bit over the top, but you get the idea.
Here’s a possible way to handle it. “Thanks for taking a shot, Tom. What about the others? What do you think the passage says about that?”
Here are the priorities:
Get back to the Bible. Ask, “What does the Bible, specifically this passage, say?”
Draw in others to help correct the person and the thought.
If no one else is quite getting it, this is where you can step in and show how the passage speaks to the issue.
The point is you’re not there to win an argument, but to guide your group in biblical truth and obedient living. Besides, how you handle someone who is clearly going in the wrong direction will model to the others how they can do the same when they get into their own coaching relationships.
Bottom line: Be prepared for this sort of thing to happen. It will. So ask God to guide you. He will. And keep in mind, some of the best breakthroughs happen when there is some tension to push through.
PROTECT
Here are some simple guidelines for your group:
What’s shared here, stays here.
Everyone gets to participate, but no one is allowed to dominate.
When someone shares something sensitive, remind the group of the value of confidentiality.
And it’s important for you to quickly get on top of someone who is dominating the meeting. It’s easy to do. Just break in and say, “Thanks for that, Sue. Lia, what do you think?”
If the person continues to dominate, the next time you ask a question, don’t leave any space for Sue to chime in. Simply say, “Nora, can you answer our next question?”
Nothing will kill your meeting like a domineering person. So be direct and protect your group.
If the relationships in your group become toxic, you need to protect those who want to learn and mature. In other words, you may have to “fire” a disciple or decide to disciple them on their own away from the group for a time.
RULES OF ENGAGEMENT
When you meet together, more than likely the group members have different answers to the Discover questions. Please treat each other with respect. Throughout your journey together, let the following Bible passages set the rules for your engagement:
James 1:19-20 (NIV)
19 My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, 20 because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires.
1 Peter 3:15 (NIV)
In your hearts revere Christ as Lord. Always be prepared to give an answer to everyone who asks you to give the reason for the hope that you have. But do this with gentleness and respect.
For everyone’s protection, men should mentor men and women should mentor women. The exception is where a married couple together mentors a mixed group or another married couple. But even then, when there is need for one-on-one discussion or follow-up, the rule of men with men and women with women applies.
CHALLENGE
Challenge your group to think, ask, share, change, repent, trust, obey.
Challenge your group to read through the 3 weekly follow-up Bible passages.
Remind them there is a cost to being a follower/disciple of Jesus.
Challenge them to count the cost and pay the price.
Remind them that the treasure of Jesus Christ is worth our all (see Matthew 13:44-46).
REPLICATE
The goal in all of this is to help your apprentices to become guides for others.
The best way to prepare them to lead their own group is by asking them to share leadership in your current group. That’s why each week the 3/3s Format asks Who will facilitate our next meeting? Share the leadership and prepare everyone to become a leader on their own.
Wouldn’t it be great if each participant felt motivated and prepared to start a Discovery Discipleship Group on their own?
As Paul said to Timothy …
2 Timothy 2:1-2
1 You, then, my child, be empowered by the grace that is in Christ Jesus 2 and what you have heard from me in the presence of many witnesses entrust to faithful people, who will be able to teach others also.
This is how The Way can become a disciples-making-disciples movement.
As we like to say, Everyone Discipled / Everyone Discipling.
WE’RE HERE FOR YOU
As you can see, being a discipleship guide is a high calling. It will certainly stretch you, but ultimately it will be good for you. Let these passages encourage you:
Joshua 1:9 (NIV)
Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged, for the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.
Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)
5 Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; 6 in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.
James 1:5 (NIV)
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.
Matthew 28:18-20 (NIV)
18 Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”
Not only will the Lord help you, we’re here to help too. To use a Home Depot motto:
YOU CAN DO IT—WE CAN HELP
How can we help? Call the person who coached you. Or call or text Karl House at (616) 287-3722.
Whatever you do, don’t just tough it out. You’ll be amazed how a little help can go a long way.
We’re here for you!